Readers responded richly to Etiquetteer’s call for what bothered them about Other People’s Behavior, including these choice morsels.
Perhaps unsurprisingly, Personal Volume grates on us, particularly with cell phones. “Cellphones on speaker, anywhere,” said one reader. This is especially apparent on public transportation, but also in checkout lines. “Why do people on cell phones think that we all want to hear their conversations?” asks another reader. “ I heard a man on the phone the other day as clearly as could be, and he was on the other side of a busy four-lane road.” Etiquetteer doesn’t really think people want us to hear their conversations; they simply do not care about the impact they have on others. That’s still not acceptable.
As a general rule, if you find yourself having to say “What?” or “I can’t hear you,” it’s time to end your call and try again when you’re someplace quieter — preferably at home. Multitasking is overrated, and that includes trying to have a phone chat near too many other people.
Speaking of checkout lines, another reader singled out “the person in the grocery checkout who seems surprised that they need to pay” and then takes a very long time to retrieve their cash or cards to do so. Another reason not to spend your time in line on the phone! Next in line behind them is the coupon shopper who chooses things that don’t apply to the relevant coupons. Long story short, pay attention, people! Be alert!
On the travel front, those people “who won't let you exit when they are trying to enter at the same time” create problems. Remember dahlings, there will be more room for you inside when the people in there get out, whether it’s a train car or a hotel lobby. People exiting have the right of way.
Another irritant is “what the airline gate desk staff call ‘gate lice,’ the zone six people hanging near the boarding spot before zone one is called.” Etiquetteer believes this is prompted most by Fear of No Overhead Bin Space and blames the airlines in part for their usurious checked baggage fees. A better strategy is a) to wait until the zone just before yours is called and b) to travel with fewer things so your carry-on bag is smaller.
Finally, one reader shared a solution for Conversationalists Who Block Doorways: “My late maternal grandmother had a solution for church-goers who lingered in the church doorway to chat, after Sunday worship, thus impeding the egress of countless other congregants. She would remove her hat pin and stab the nearest offender in the rump. Not Recommended Behavior (not a particularly Christian response, either). Still, the older I get, the more I sympathize with her irritation at this thoughtless behavior. Stop and chat, yes — after you have cleared the doorway far enough to let others get out . . . It’s irritating behavior in any place of business.” Etiquetteer has proven many times that a Brisk Businesslike “Excuse me please” can work wonders, and does less damage than a hat pin.
Etiquetteer is always ready to hear about what’s bothering you. Please drop a line when so inclined.
