Henry “Chips” Channon, a naturalized British subject born into Chicago wealth, made his most enduring mark on English history after his death, in his remarkable diaries. It helps that he knew All Society, including Edward VIII and Mrs. Simpson, Winston Churchill, Duff and Diana Cooper, and those prominent society hostesses Laura Corrigan and Lady Emerald Cunard, among many others. It doesn’t hurt to live next door to the Duke and Duchess of Kent either.
Often our view of the past is obscured by misty images of Perfection — a court ball, for instance, or a garden party — so that we forget that people have always misbehaved. “Chips” records some marvelous social faux pas in Volume One, which cover the years 1918-1938, illustrating just why some etiquette rules ought to be followed. For instance:
Don’t go where you aren’t invited. “There was an unfortunate scene,” “Chips” recorded, at Lord Revelstoke’s ball on June 27, 1923. “Ronald Storrs . . . had dined with Lady Lovat and had somehow been cajoled by her and Lady [Emerald] Cunard and others to accompany them uninvited to the ball, they having said ‘it would be all right.’ I saw him arrive and dance several times. Suddenly Lord Revelstoke, very angry, went up to him and in none too courteous language turned him out. People discussed nothing else in whispers, most thinking that it had been very careless and underbred of [Storrs] to have come and rather worse for his unwilling host to order him out . . . “ So no one comes out of this covered in glory, but Etiquetteer really blames Lady Lovat and Lady Cunard for persuading (bullying?) Storrs into going. It’s their carelessness with their host’s generosity that caused the whole fuss to begin with. Naughty naughty girls!
Don’t dawdle. Make up your mind! On March 5, 1935, George Gage, a viscount by this time, showed up at a cocktail party and “took seven minutes to decide whether he wanted a cocktail or whisky and soda!“ Always have your drink order ready when approaching the bar, or being approached with a tray. You may always order something else for the next round.
If punctuality is the politeness of kings, when the king is punctual, be early to be polite. One of the greatest social events of “Chips’” life was when King Edward VIII came to dinner at his home, 3 Belgrave Square, on June 11, 1936. One of the tenets of royal etiquette is that the monarch arrives last and departs first. “Dinner was announced, doors were flung open and no Lady Cunard.” That Emerald, making trouble again! “When we had arrived there was a gap next to the King, where Emerald should have sat, and several moments of anxiety on my part until she arrived, apologetically*. Princess Marina whispered ‘Quand le roi dîne, on s'arrange pour être à l'heure**.’” Remember dahlings, early is on time, on time is late, late is absent.
Mark Twain may have said “Don’t let the truth get the way of a good story,” but don’t let a good story compromise global diplomacy. “Chips” overhead Emerald (she really is a troublemaker!) on the phone with Ribbentrop (!) inviting him to the opera. “She then suddenly said ‘Corbin, the French Ambassador, wants to meet you very much. He says that you are perfectly charming.’ The German’s voice dropped with surprise . . . I asked Emerald whether Corbin had ever said such a thing, she laughingly admitted that she had invented it on the spur of the moment. Will her whimsical invitation have repercussions on the political situation in Europe?” When you hobnob with ambassadors, the “little white lie” can create a lot of trouble.
Lady Emerald Cunard, that naughty hostess
*”When the king dines, one arranges to be on time.”
**Etiquetteer vaguely remembers Dominick Dunne reporting on just such a contretemps between Raquel Welch and Princess Margaret at some sort of luncheon in the Caribbean. Ms. Welch, arriving after the start of the luncheon, made her curtsey tableside. Her Royal Highness greeted her with a glance at her wristwatch to make a point.