“The late Mr. Dimmick was frequently seized with fits of whimsy so obscure that only he could truly appreciate them.” — from a prospective fauxbituary
“So Robert,” you might be asking, “just what is all this ‘Howard Johnson’s at Versailles’ nonsense?” And after seeing all the commentary and concern (concern!) about an apparently white-on-white kitchen, I see I am going to have to share more of my inspiration to convince people that, yes, I’m crazy, but not crazy in the way you think I’m crazy.
First stop: J.B. West’s Upstairs at the White House, and his conversation with Jackie Kennedy on page 199 about the new kitchen for the second floor. Asked whether she wanted to see a kitchen designer, Jackie laughingly replied “Heavens no! . . . Just make it white and ask René [Verdon] what he wants in there.” You’re not going to argue with Jackie, now, are you? Because you know what Mr. West said about her: “The trick was to read her correctly, to accomplish everything she wanted, and not to oppose her in anything.”
Truly I know only the very best people - that’s you! - for whom I am always grateful. Yesterday it was evidenced by a lot of good advice about how to evaluate paint colors: getting large paper paint chips, actually painting the different whites on the wall to evaluate, looking at the colors at different times of day, etc. My English friends expressed concern that any specifc shade of white might fade to something else, and that I’d still end up with my Philip Marlowe observation anyway.
And my goodness, such spirited advocacy for specific shades! White Dove was definitely the winner here, and even recommended by one friend especially for rooms with western exposure. (The kitchen has a west-northwest exposure.) The volume of opinions about white paint really took me by surprise.
A mid-century Howard Johnson’s greeting card.
But mostly what I noticed was an undercurrent of concern about all that white. Won’t you need sunglasses, Robert? Why not think about painting the walls a complementary color? That’s a valid question. The complementary colors won’t be on the walls, but on the floor and ceiling. The Howard Johnson’s palette is white, turquoise, and orange. Originally I’d thought of using this Assault Orange vinyl flooring - wouldn’t that set off my gramma’s teal Leatherette chairs! - and painting the ceiling turquoise, but I was sort of talked out of that because a) it’s a small room, really, and b) just no. No! So the floor will actually be pale blue vinyl tile* from a company recommended by my English friends, and the ceiling will be a pale orange that’s still bold enough not to be mistaken for beige.
The white of those walls will also be studded with Gramma’s Fiestaware, some of which was displayed in the old kitchen over the stove. The original Fiestaware palette is a bold one: yellow, green, sky blue, navy blue, cream, and my beloved radioactive orange actually made with uranium oxide.
Not actually my Fiestaware, which has definitely seen better days.
I haven’t talked a lot about furniture here (some very patient friends have heard it more than once!), but everything in the room will be mid-century. Besides Gramma’s teal Leatherette chairs and the glass magazine table between them to make my Cozy Nook, the maple desk from Gramma’s dining room will go between the windows for the coffee station**. In the end “Howard Johnson’s” was a handy catch-call for the mid-century stuff I have plus my love of garish color. Perhaps another time I’ll go into the “Versailles” part.
It also occured to me this morning that all that white will actually make a good contrast with the Red Room Bedroom. With its bordello-red walls, midnight blue ceiling, and one of my grandmother’s dark carpets on the floor, it’s a dark little cave in which to hibernate. These two rooms will be as different as night and day, and I rather like the idea of that contrast. Maybe I’ll need less coffee in the morning . . .
Note also the Franciscan Starburst, which will also feature in the new kitchen.
And if, once it’s all done, I find I really cannot abide all that white, I’ll just rename it the Varykino Room.
Varykino!
*Yes, I tested it for scuff marks at the insistence of friends, with my furlane, the ones that have recycled bicycle tires for soles. It passed the test.
**I made sure to request an electrical outlet just above the height of the desk for the coffeemaker.