April is National Afternoon Tea Month — but really shouldn’t we be celebrating this constantly? The occasion of afternoon tea needn’t be confined to hotel dining rooms; indeed, it can feel more relaxed at home. Etiquetteer has a few points worth stating, or restating, for your tea at home:
Use the good stuff! We don’t have things just to have them, but to use them. If you are fortunate enough to have a silver teapot or real honest-to-goodness china cups and saucers, for Heaven’s sake, get ‘em out! Like that French skin care company says, “You’re worth it.”
That includes napkins. A napkin is just as essential to afternoon tea as the teapot. Don’t preserve those pretty embroidered bits of linen. If you’re worried about soiling them, well . . . a) don’t serve anything that stains, like jam, and b) run to the laundry room as soon as your guests have gone. You know those signs outside Orthodox churches that read “Women with lipstick please do not venerate icons?” No, you may not reproduce it to protect your napkins from lipstick; that’s too inhospitable.
Don’t forget the strainer. Everyone has their own method for brewing loose leaf tea, either letting it swim about freely in the pot or confining it in a tea ball. That’s entirely between you and your teapot; Etiquetteer is not here to judge you.* But errant tea leaves may appear regardless, and using a strainer will keep you and your guests from enduring too much roughage in the cup. (That Mr. Dimmick Who Thinks He Knows So Much forgot the strainer recently when entertaining a fastidious friend, with unfortunate results. How humiliating. Etiquetteer has labored with That Mr. Dimmick so hard, and it seems to make no difference.)
The slops bowl is there for mistakes. When you do forget the strainer, the slops bowl is there so you can pour it out and start over without having to go to the kitchen. A Perfectly Proper slops bowl does not have to match the rest of your tea service (though it may), nor does it have to look utilitarian. Find something beautiful.
Simplicity is key. Afternoon tea at home does not have to include a dazzling array of sandwiches and cookies and whatnot (though it’s often delightful). One good pound cake, or a plate of bread and butter or cookies, ought to be good enough for anybody.
Silence, too, is key. Don’t let your spoon be heard against the sides of your teacup. All we want to hear is what you have to say. Afternoon tea is really just an elegant excuse for conversation and confidences. Don’t drown them out. Just let your teaspoon glide back and forth, not quite touching the cup.
Etiquetteer wishes you a beautiful and Perfectly Proper tea with all the best conversation and confidences.
*At least not about that. 😉