For International Tea Day, Etiquetteer offers a few tips for a Perfectly Proper afternoon tea.
Use the good stuff. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with having a mug of tea in the kitchen, but the reverse is true, too. There’s nothing wrong with getting out that One Special Teacup and the Good Teapot and treating yourself to a quiet hour in the living room, either. Why not?
Drink what’s offered. A tea service comes with one teapot, which means everyone is drinking the same thing. Unless there are medical reasons (Science has taught us that caffeine can have deleterious effects for some), accept your cup gratefully whether it’s the type of tea you prefer or not. The purpose of the gathering is not to serve you a cup of tea you find perfect, but fellowship and conversation. The sensations of a cup of tea last only a moment. Etiquetteer has faith in you.
Bring your own sweetener. If, for whatever reason, you simply cannot do without a particular type of sweetener, it is better for you to bring it with you. Your hosts want to spend time talking with you, not ferreting through their pantries. For Etiquetteer’s Dear Father it was Sweet ‘n’ Low; for others it could be agave nectar or something else. There’s no need to be embarrassed about it, just don’t call excessive attention to it.
But wise hosts offer more than just tea. It is always Perfectly Proper to offer sherry at the tea hour, and a pitcher of ice water can go a long way (and is also an alternative destination for lemon slices.)
Know your teas. Not all teas are brewed the same, and it helps to know this before filling the teapot. This guide from Grace Tea Company will help you a great deal.
Don’t steep it too long. They say George Bernard Shaw ended up a vegetarian with a sensitive stomach because, as a child, the maids basically left the teakettle on the stove all day, steeping it into pure tannin. The cure for this is to thin a too-strong cup of tea with boiling water; this is why a truly proper tea service come with a tea kettle on a stand over a flame; Etiquetteer, unencumbered with such a kettle, has to run off to the kitchen when required. At the other end of the spectrum, pour your tea too soon and you’ll be accused of serving “maiden’s water” or “aura of tea.”
Check the silver in advance. If you store your silver in those miraculous Pacific Cloth bags, this will really not be too tough a chore. But especially if you’re having company, scan each piece quickly beforehand and polish where it’s needed. (Etiquetteer was recently appalled with two Ps to see the true state of a silver tea strainer. It could happen to you . . . )
The slops bowl is your friend. Unheralded and unsung, the slops bowl is the true workhorse of the tea service, the receptacle of the dregs from every teacup before pouring fresh. While they sometimes come in silver, they are more usually china. Etiquetteer recommends a bowl with relatively high sides so that no one has to look at a leafy puddle of waste.
Consider lump sugar. Etiquetteer recently observed a sugar bowl filled with rough lumps of both white and cane (tan) sugar that was Perfectly Charming. Even if you’re going to offer regular sugar cubes, you’ll need proper sugar tongs — sometimes called sugar nips — to do so. Since they aren’t as common as they once were, it will make the tea hour more special.
Cup and saucer together. Whether your cup and saucer are before you on the table or resting cautiously on your knee — which is Not Really Perfectly Proper — lift them both to a level above your waist before lifting the cup to your lips.
Etiquetteer wishes you a Perfectly Proper, and Perfectly Delightful, tea hour.