Yesterday I began a one-week trip through Louisiana and Georgia to see family for the first time since Mother died in 2019.
1) After Le Diner en Blanc Saturday night, it was, um, challenging to get up at 4:45 AM to get to the airport. Among other things, my Lyft driver told me that traffic starts to pick up in the tunnels as early as 6:00 AM. We had no difficulty getting there, so I felt virtuous about an early start.
2) My flights down were uneventful except for turbulence between Philadelphia and New Orleans, and my anxiety about the turbulence (which was greater than the turbulence). I got through it more calmly than usual by reading The Picture of Dorian Gray, which I haven’t read in more than a few years.
2a) This is a good book for me to be reading at this particular period in my life. I read it first 40 years ago (proof of which is inside the book, an ATM receipt dated April 23, 1983, from my college checking account), and discussed it with my Aunt Betty. She said it was the most evil book she’d ever read in her life. Naturally I found it fascinating, but now I see why she came to fear it.
3) Not having seen my sister in four years, I imagined what it would be like to see her at the airport and give her a big hug. Instead, our reunion began with a lot of texting from the plane, and then me at the curb hastily tossing my bags into the back seat, and myself in after them. We had to save a more affectionate greeting for home.
4) En route home over the causeway — that infinite view remains unchanged — Tony and Laura and I talked about family, craft distilleries, absinthe, and other things.
5) After two solid hours of sleep, I was awakened for the cocktail hour, which I opened by making my brother-in-law a Colony Special martini on the rocks. The final result was a bit heavy on the absinthe, but he declared it what he liked.
5a) Throughout this process, and gumbo for dinner, I was introduced to the Marvel Universe. Paul Rudd looks marvelous.
6) After dinner, Laura brought out a lot of photo albums, one of the principal reasons I made this trip. There were happy memories, uncomfortable memories, and lots of “Who is that?”
6a) Quite possibly the Golden Discovery of this initial foray was a set of index cards with Mother’s notes from the play given by all the grandchildren at Granny and Grampa’s 50th wedding anniversary in 1970.
7) Up at 5:30 Monday morning after a sound sleep, anticipating a 7:00 departure for Lago di Carlo so I could meet the baby, and so we could both go to the cemetery. My brother-in-law makes excellent coffee, and I was able to write my pages and have a bite of breakfast before we got on the road at 7:15.
8) At about 11 AM we pulled up to my beloved Seafood Palace after a long drive studded with family talk, local news, Stevie Nicks, the Bee Gees, and similar things. I’d only thought about Seafood Palace about half an hour from town. What a happy thing than Alex could bring the baby to join us!
8a) Walking in I was startled to see that a) every eye was on us, and b) they’d redecorated to have one very large room instead of two medium rooms, new tile flooring, and bright red cinderblock walls. But their chicken and sausage gumbo remains as excellent as always.
9) Miss Layla is quite simply adorable, and reminds me so much of her father, Younger Nephew Who Must Not Be Tagged. Her big eyes bright with curiosity, her smile when she chooses to share it, her curling hair, her unhappy expression when teething a lemon wedge she insisted on trying — her father all over again.
9a) And her mother Alex is an ally in so many ways, not least her engagement in community theatre. So we had a lot to catch up on.
My childhood home. Notice how the roots of the oak tree have cracked the driveway. Notice also the tree growing right next to the front door. New since my time! And its roots mean no good to the foundation.
10) After lunch, Laura and I drove by our childhood home on Orchid Street. When we drove past in 2019, all the oak trees that didn’t quite cover our front yard when we were growing up had made a dark tunnel of the street — a proper oak alley. Now, after Hurricane Laura in 2020, several trees were just gone, but not the one in front of our old house. It absolutely dwarfs the house!
11) We drove to the baby’s house afterward, where Miss Layla’s playpen takes up almost the whole living room. Alex has painted it a rich dark blue and has decorated one wall with a mural of phosphorescent jellyfish. Another, in progress, is the shark from Jaws. My mother was so creative, though she never expressed herself in paint. I think she would have loved those jellyfish.
11) The cemetery was not far away. Pulling in, I was aware of the loss of trees here, too, especially in the heat. Laura had prepared bouquets of silk flowers (I think real flowers are not permitted at this cemetery) for our parents and Uncle Bill, our grandparents, and for Uncle Tom and Aunt Joan. Tentacles of St. Augustine grass were starting to encroach on Uncle Bill, requiring me to take action.
11a) I practice bibliomancy, and had brought a Bible from the guest room that I recognized from Mother’s house. Bibliomancy is all very well when you find something interesting and inspiring, but not when you end up at any of the Old Testament “begats” or, as happened, the Book of Ruth, which is a very long saga for a brief moment in a cemetery under blazing sunshine in 90+ degree heat. I ended up at Proverbs 24, which begins “Be not thou envious against evil men, neither desire to be with them. For their heart studieth destruction, and their lips talk to mischief.”
12) My sister remained remarkably patient, and I am so grateful.
13) To begin our return drive Laura went down Shell Beach Drive and past the Civic Centre and the CM Tower — the latter still mostly plywood after Hurricane Laura. Lago di Carlo has suffered much.
14) I am proud to say I did not fall asleep once on the return drive. I noticed a billboard I missed on the morning’s drive: “Welcome to Livingston Parish. We love our schools, our churches, and the Second Amendment. Enjoy your stay.” It seems people are talking about it.
15) Back in Mandeville, we three went to Times Grill for a burger. For me the place gave off vibes like Doyle’s — but very new, and very football — and the old fashioned I ordered was sooooo sweeeeeet I had to order a shot of whiskey to balance it.
16) Now Laura and I are watching Moonstruck, coincidentally a movie about family dynamics. My week is starting off very well indeed, and I am looking forward to more conversations, more old photos, and more laughs.