“Any fool can make a rule//And any fool will mind it.” — Henry David Thoreau
“To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven.” — Ecclesiastes 3:1
Etiquetteer is weary. As someone somewhere once said, “Can’t we put aside this stale old quarrel?”
People love taking sides on issues that will not topple governments. The Oxford comma, for instance, and decorative schemes for White House interiors come to mind — not to mention the pitched battle between Bette Davis and Joan Crawford partisans.* In that vein, people love to defy the traditional rule that white is not worn after Labor Day, and to call attention to their defiance with malicious glee.
Etiquetteer loves tradition, as you know. Monday night saw the annual storing of the white bucks, which passed off without incident. And on Tuesday morning from every corner of social media came the annual posts of Beverly Sutphin assaulting Juror #8 in Serial Mom,** mostly from people who otherwise pay no attention to their shoes. You know it well, even if you haven’t seen the movie.
“Fashion has changed!” cries Juror #8. She’s not wrong; fashion changes by definition and with the desire for novelty. Beverly Sutphin has mistaken Fashion for both Tradition and Style. Etiquetteer can hardly blame her for lashing out.
But you know — Etiquetteer is just done with the violence. Yes, it used to be funny. Maybe it just hits differently this year. Traditionalists and Those Who Simply Don’t Care must form a truce. Other, more pressing issues claim our attention, especially in this election year. Now run along and enjoy your pumpkin spice latte — while it’s in season.
Etiquetteer is weary as far back as 2014.
*Etiquetteer will leave the Oxford comma debate to the grammarians, continue to advocate for the return of a Blue Room that is actually blue, and — as much as he loves both those actresses — will retreat to the corner with Olivia de Haviland while their insane acolytes flame each other.
**How can it be that this movie premiered 30 years ago?!