For this final column of Volume 20, Etiquetteer is ceding the podium to That Mr. Dimmick Who Thinks He Knows So Much. Let’s just see what he does with it.
Well, we made it! As we cross the finish line into the New Year at midnight, we should all give each other a pat on the back for having preserved as much of our Perfect Propriety as we could. Did you make a New Year’s resolution a year ago? Did you go as far with it as you thought you might? Even if not, give yourself credit for whatever you put into it, and think about a different resolution for 2022. I cannot remember where I saw this recently*, but in a piece about making New Year’s resolutions, someone suggested “Make a resolution you want to keep.” That really gives a new slant to the whole idea of a resolution, now doesn’t it?
For myself — and Etiquetteer, glaring over my shoulder — today marks the successful completion of a New Year’s resolution: a year of 100 published columns, a milestone I’ve long wished to achieve. Some, I can say with Possibly Pardonable Pride, came out extremely well**. Others . . . well, nobody really ought to see how the sausage is made. But as Julia Cameron says in The Artist’s Way, “God, you take care of the quality. I will take care of the quantity.”
In 2022, I’m going to make sure Etiquetteer resolves to produce another 100 columns, starting day after tomorrow — which will also commence Etiquetteer’s birthday month. Yes, Etiquetteer turns 21 on Sunday, January 30! And while the pandemic is 99.99999999999% likely to keep me from having an in-person celebration, I can anticipate some special January content leading up to the day.
So often when people make a resolution, it’s about being better, about making the world a better place. This year let’s approach that from the opposite end of the spectrum. Whatever you do that’s ugly, that puts ugliness out in the world — stop that. Think about how you manifest ugliness in the world — I’m not going to speculate about what that might be, you know yourself better than I do — but I know for myself I need to react less quickly to — how shall I say this? — inflammatory and false social media content. I’m not the only one contributing to what’s grandly termed the National Discourse, and I am sometimes one of those who contribute to making it Less Grand and More . . . . More What We Don’t Want. I need to make whatever I’m contributing less immediate and more considered.
Sometimes at the end of the year I’ve put together a Year in Review column to look back at Notable Lapses in Perfect Propriety. But in a year that started with an unprecedented insurrection, I simply didn’t have the stomach for it. So as we approach midnight, I’ll offer as I have in the past Lady Jane Marryot’s toast from Noel Coward’s Cavalcade:
“Let’s drink to the hope that one day this country of ours, which we love so much, will find dignity and grace and peace again.”
And in the words of the late Norma Desmond, “Happy New Year, darling.
* If you find it, please do send me the information.
** Browse through the index for your favorites. Squarespace is a little wonky with the index page, so if nothing appears, please refresh the page.